What's the word for that indescribable feeling where there's this worry in the back of your heart - deep, deep down, but it's hidden by this inundating overjoy? What's the word for when you love someone so, so dearly that there's no absolute way of telling them without sounding inane? What' the word for that wait - that long, grueling wait where all you want to do is run and run and run forever into a future so perfectly carved? What's the word? Tell me and I'll treasure you forever?
Today, February 19, 2011, my month birthday, has been one of the greatest days of all my life.
It started off with a cute outfit for my debate tournament, a place where I learned the true meaning of friendship. A couple of weeks ago, this girl had told me that "real friends don't judge". Well...I, then realized, that I've been judging all my friends for the longest times ever. Today, however, I met one person whom has created a great person within me. At the same time, I reunited with my best friend from four years ago - learning that things change as time ensues. We hugged and shouted and talked and all that good stuff, but I just thought of her as a person of my past. Nothing really more.
I haven't debated in over a year, and to debate again felt so amazing. I love the rush of counterbalances and fooling around. I love the feeling of being right and of feeling so proud. Possible law student? Nah...most likely not; but future humanitarian and civil rights activist? Hell yes.
Well - a couple of other good stuff happens - and then I return home (right before awards) to prepare for my friend's surprise sweet 16. I come home and there's my mom...someone whom I want to aspire to; someone I wish I could emulate. She quickly feeds me the food - curry and white rice - kisses me and shows me the outfit she picked out for me. It was an orange, striped, nautical summer dress, with a cute cardigan, and an European-esque bag. Perfect.
And I just love my parents so so so so so so so (times a bajilion more) much. I wish I could do as much as they did for me. I wish the best for them, and I vow that I will make them proud. I promise.
Well, the surprise party went great. I laughed and talked and listened and learned and it was just so perfect. Seeing that face on my friend's face was truly marvelous. I wish her the best.
So, now I'm back home, and I'm just so overwhelmed.
I feel beautiful...and just so happy.
Good night loves,